What the FUCK Rolling Stone?

Rolling Stone's new cover featured Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, looking like a rock star. Yes he looks normal, sweet, young, even attractive, but he is accused of very serious crimes! Yeah this shit is fucked up! I could understand (not be happy about) if it was on TIME magazine and a photo of him in court or something! But this literally looks like it could be an album cover. I think it is important that he be given a trial, not because I believe he is necessarily innocent but because of the gravity of what could happen if a truly innocent percent through a mistaken ID etc. was punished for such a horrendous act but not be able to defend themselves. This isn't a magazine about world events, though they do feature some. They literally made Dzhokhar Tsarnaev look like a rock star. Shameful! I would even understand this kind of feature for someone jailed for peaceful protest, or even property damage in regard to an honorable cause. Like throwing red paint on fur coats or chaining yourself to a tree or building to prevent it's destruction. But absolutely not for killing and maiming innocent people as part of a radical distortion of reality falsely in the name of God. Not the first time they have pulled this stunt they also featured Charles Manson on the cover. There are sick people out there that see things like this and to them it means fame, infamy, becoming an idol and celebrity. And why shouldn't they? It sure looks that way to me. So, shame on you Rolling Stone. I respect your rights to free expression, free press, and speech but this is just tasteless and only adds to an already growing problem of people associating mass murder with stardom, notoriety, and esteem. It's pretty sick, and no, not in a good way.

I love OUR President

After the verdict was read in the case of the shooting death of Trayvon Martin many people were understandably hurt, outraged, crushed, and shocked. What upset me most and kept me up at night was the idea of riots. I knew how much the media was circulating the possibility of riots after the verdict. I felt they could be pushing it to the point of being a self-fulfilling prophecy. Thank God no one took their bait. I hoped that after the public heard Trayvon's parents plea for peace in the wake of what I and many others believe to be a great miscarriage of justice. I saw something rather pointed yesterday I am not sure if I can share their name so I won't but they posted to facebook, "The majority of people who believe that George Zimmerman should be not guilty would care much more about the sanctity of Trayvon's life if he had still been just a fetus." It is sad but frighteningly true point. 

Anyway back to the riots that never happened: I had no real concern of rioting before the news media started spouting their riot theories, where they would happen, to what degree, would this mean a race war?!?! How fucking irresponsible. I have to say I can't help but feel like those are dangerous and negligent ideas to be putting out into the world. Thankfully people understood that more violence is not the answer. We have to find some way to change our world. We have to. It has become so ugly and hateful and divided. People are so hung up on who is right and who is wrong that these grudges begin to run deeper, the hate flies back and forth and we poison ourselves and our children with negativity. We need to teach love. We need to teach respectful disagreements. We need to teach every person the value of a life and how no matter your gender, religion, sexual orientation, race you are worthy of respect and there should be no reason for you to fear your neighbor. I don't know how to do that in a world that is so backwards.  We have got to stop killing each other. It is so easy to pull a trigger and impossible to make up for permanently removing a human being from this Earth. I beg you all to stop the killing. 

I know people are so touchy about gun laws and restrictions but they are so necessary especially right now. I had to fill out more paperwork to adopt a dog than I did to buy a FNH FXP 9mm. It came with three 10 round magazines. If I had each magazine loaded and one already in the chamber, if I am a good shot that is potentially 31 lives that I could take. The scary thing is you just have to trust that I am responsible, and sane enough not to ever attempt such a heinous act. I'm sorry but I just don't trust my fellow Americans enough for that idea to sit right with me. And the backwards logic is because I can't trust other people not to be psychopaths I own one. Don't get me wrong it is terribly fun to go to the shooting range. I do sleep easier knowing that it is near by. The thing is if they weren't so damn easy to get I wouldn't have to worry about nut bag up the street who orders guns and ammo online and has enough to supply his very own militia in his basement. We need better gun laws, we need stricter punishments for people caught with illegal firearms, those that aren't registered. If you are a felon convicted of a violent crime and you are caught with a gun you get 10 years min. Felony sex offenders you get 15. Institute an anonymous government buy back program for illegal fire arms. If we can find enough money to wage wars we can spend it to protect our own people. Oh and I mean education, and healthcare too. If we took better care of our people there would be less competition for survival more opportunities and less stealing and killing. People don't fall into a criminal way of life because they want to, or it seems fun, it's because they don't see any other option to provide for themselves or their family. 

But after all that rambling THIS IS WHY I LOVE PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA, "The death of Trayvon Martin was a tragedy. Not just for his family, or for any one community, but for America. I know this case has elicited strong passions. And in the wake of the verdict, I know those passions may be running even higher. But we are a nation of laws, and a jury has spoken. I now ask every American to respect the call for calm reflection from two parents who lost their young son. And as we do, we should ask ourselves if we’re doing all we can to widen the circle of compassion and understanding in our own communities. We should ask ourselves if we’re doing all we can to stem the tide of gun violence that claims too many lives across this country on a daily basis. We should ask ourselves, as individuals and as a society, how we can prevent future tragedies like this. As citizens, that’s a job for all of us. That’s the way to honor Trayvon Martin." 

Well said sir. I couldn't agree more. Now let's stop being selfish, petty, fear mongers and change out country. Lay down the guns and pick up someone in need of kindness, generosity, love, friendship. If I sound like a communist, socialist, hippie well then I guess that's me. I guess I am selfish because I don't want to fear for my future children. I don't want to be afraid of the poison they eat, drink, breathe. Or the equally destructive poison they see, hear, and feel from their brothers and sisters. Mother Teresa said, "If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other." I want a beautiful safe place for my kids because I never want to feel what his parents felt when someone took the law into their own hands and made a decision to end his life. I don't want to live in fear for my kids. Because man pulling a trigger is easy but you can never put back the pieces. I don't think anyone realizes how permanent death is.

I will leave you with this, a member of Trayvon's foundation said ,“Trayvon Martin cannot rest in peace if there’s not peace in our streets,” and advise you to, “raise your voice, not your hands.”

An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind.
-Mahatma Gandhi 

Abortion and Texas Women

Apparently I have decided to write two posts today... My second is about abortion, women's rights, and the controversial abortion ban in Texas. Oh, yeah and Sarah Slamen a super boss lady. First of all have you seen the video? You know where she rips the Texas Senate committee a new one. They came out looking like tyrant bullies. When Slamen laid into them about what exactly qualified them to be experts on women's reproductive health. Long story short, nothing. They are full of hot air and when she called them out on their complete lack of qualifications they lost their cool. They had her removed from the stand and escorted out. She even said, "This is my government" and boy I used to believe that. I was appalled to see her drug out of that court room. They simply weren't willing to be called out on what fools they are and for everyone to see their facade so rapidly and systematically torn down. This woman deserves a standing ovation for pointing out what a farce this committee is. It scares me that she was forcibly removed, never before have I see an American citizen's rights be violated in such a flagrant manner. My jaw hit the floor. I was ashamed of my country when I saw that. I wonder what our military men and women would feel if they saw one of the most basic rights they defend stripped of a fellow citizen in such a blatant display of disrespect and denial. It worries me for the women of Texas and all over this country particularly in traditionally conservative states.

  We are women, we are strong, informed, and we have the power to vote and have our voices heard. I am a catholic convert. I also take birth control and while I don't believe in abortion for myself in the case of an unplanned pregnancy that is not my choice to make for other women. I can certainly tell you if I were the victim of rape I would most definitely terminate a resulting pregnancy. If I were to have a child with a severe birth defect such as Tay-Sachs or Sirenomelia I would end the pregnancy because I believe it to be the most merciful option. Because of my religious beliefs I feel while it may be a sin on my part and it would be a heartbreaking choice, that baby would be innocent and would obviously go to heaven where it would not suffer as it would if it were to be born into this world. That choice would be between me and my God and no one else should have any say in the matter. I don't agree with the proposed bill in TX which would limit abortion providers to only 5 centers state wide. That is absurd. What I find frightening is that Republican Jodie Laubenberg (TX) who opposed amendments to the ban apparently thinks that rape kits "clean a woman out" basically like a "d & c" and therefor makes up for closing all but 5 abortion clinics. WRONG wrong WRONG. I was ashamed for this woman. As a state representative, an adult, and even more as a woman I expect you to know better. I bet her and Todd Akin get along great with their mythical ideas of how a woman can prevent pregnancies resulting from rape. Get out of the government if you couldn't even pass a semester of high school sex ed. Yes if you are raped they do a rape kit, they swab for DNA, and give you antibiotics to try and prevent contracting and STD's or STI's. In some cases you may be offered the Plan B emergency contraceptive but that is not part of the rape kit, you likely will have to come out of pocket for the cost, and the real shocker that is nothing even close to a D&C (Dilation and Curettage) procedure. Shame on you Jodie Laubenberg for being so ill informed about your bill, and your body. 

What I will now share with you, which may be an unpopular opinion. I SUPPORT BANNING ABORTIONS AFTER 20 WEEKS! Now, with the stipulation barring any medical emergency, miscarriage/death of fetus, new information about the condition of the fetus or possible diseases etc. and of course if say a woman was abducted and raped resulting in pregnancy past the 20 week mark. Twenty weeks is roughly 5 months, if four more weeks the fetus is considered viable. I can not as a woman (once again barring any exigent circumstances) understand why you would intend on having an abortion and just not get around to it for five months? If there is some reason that you can think of why it may be necessary to wait five months for an abortion and yet can't manage to wait another 12 weeks and put the baby up for adoption please enlighten me? Perhaps you don't notice you are pregnant the first 3 months you still  have another 8 weeks to procure an abortion. But at 5 Months you have to endure a two day procedure, first to inject the fetus with a toxin that ends it's life and begin dilating the cervix. Day two under twilight sedation your cervix is dilated, the body is cut into smaller sections and removed through the cervix/vagina. Yes, it is not the same as a full term labor and delivery but at this point it does seem selfish and wasteful. I believe in having sex responsibly and that means if I had unprotected sex, and for whatever reason was not on birth control, taking Plan B, if that didn't work then an abortion is an option but I can't imagine dropping the ball on taking care of it for five months. Anyone have a reason why a 20 week ban as described is should not be enacted? 

If you agree or like my posts at all please follow me on twitter! I would love to know if anyone out there is reading.  

Vestal Harlot Twitter Page


Sarah Slamen Destroys TX Committee  


Jodie Laubenberg Rape Kit=Abortion 

Trayvon Martin

I will never be suspicious like Trayvon Martin. Let me say that again. I will NEVER be suspicious like Trayvon. Period. Regardless of who threw the first punch, Zimmerman believed Trayvon to be a criminal by looking at him. I could put on all black sweats, tuck my hair back, put on a flat billed hat and pull my hood up over my face as I walk through my neighborhood. No one is going to call the police. No one is going to try and flag me down. No one will reach over and lock their car door. No one is going to fear me. And no one is going to shoot and kill me because they are afraid of me. I am a 5'0", White, Woman. I don't strike fear in the heart of anyone, no one would describe me as sketchy or menacing. So what does that say about our world? In our world no matter how I am dressed I am taught to be afraid to walk alone at any time of day, and at night, forget about it. We are taught that our neighbors are killers, around every corner a mugger, behind every dumpster a rapist. In this case there are no winners. I put myself in Trayvon's position and having lived literally across the lake from where he was shot, I feel I do have a unique ability compared to many other American's to do so. If I had been walking through that neighborhood and any adult man or woman of any color, age or size tried to stop me, I would have been afraid. If they came near me I would not have hesitated to become violent. I would have thrown the first punch, kick, scratch, bite. No question. Zimmerman was not on his property, and he did not identify himself as neighborhood watch. He acted as a vigilante, the Police had told him to stand down and not pursue Trayvon. Yes, he fought back, possibly was even the first to get physical but I bet any one of you would do the same. Zimmerman was a stranger. In a world where we are taught strangers are no longer kind generous, concerned brother's and sister's but robbers, rapists, and killers, why would he not be afraid? Don't tell me he shouldn't be afraid being a physically fit young man. I knew strong, fit, teenagers just like that who were jumped in our neighborhood with a startling frequency. And Zimmerman is no waif, and I am tired of hearing how Trayvon had such a physical advantage. Zimmerman's size is still intimidating enough. And size aside, how was he supposed to know he wasn't some loon with a loaded gun...? oh wait... he was. When I lived in the apartments across the lake we had all too many burglaries and thefts, in fact it was a huge problem at the time we lived there. But we never shot anyone. Things might have been very different had Zimmerman said, "Hey kid, stop, I am with neighborhood watch can I talk to you?" That is not what he did, and even then if I were in Trayvon's shoes I would have kept on walking or even RAN away. Unless I see a badge, I don't know you from Ted Bundy. Sorry you are literally just another civilian, same as me, I have no obligation to obey you. The facts are George Zimmerman instigated the conflict, someone threw a punch and they want to say Zimmerman was in fear for his life, I don't know what I would have done, I would wonder what would have happened had he just threatened to shoot, I wonder what would have happened had he stayed in his truck, had he said he was neighborhood watch, there are a lot of variables but the bottom line is a human life was taken. It could have been avoided. I don't know that Zimmerman deserves a first degree murder sentence because I believe things quickly got out of hand but I can tell you he needs to be punished. He needs to understand that he made a decision that resulted in the loss of a human life. I think that requires a conviction and jail time. I am not saying a life sentence but he needs to pay for what may be a mistake, but it was a grave one. Unless I see someone committing a crime, I am not going to interject myself. Unless someone deliberately is breaking into my home I am not going to take their life. Period. Unless unprovoked someone attacks me or another person, I am not a law enforcement officer, I am not going to physically or verbally accost them. It is such a sad series of events but right or wrong Trayvon paid with his life, and had Zimmerman done what the police instructed, Trayvon would probably be alive and Zimmerman wouldn't be in this mess. But I guess I really don't have to worry. Because the sad truth is after all, I will never look suspicious like Trayvon.

Fine News Stations for False or Misleading Reporting

I wish there was a way to regulate the news media like they do professional athletes. It is basically impossible to trust the reporting of any major news network. I'm not talking about getting in the way of reporting or freedom of speech or expression but if an anchor/station is reporting something that is alleged, or not yet confirmed they should make that clear. There is so much speculation that is offered up as fact that it really muddles things. So, if a news channel reports something that is later found to be untrue and unfounded then they should be fined. It seems like in the rush to be the first to report they don't even care if it is accurate. I feel like you can change channels and see very contradictory reporting so then you have to dig around the internet to find out who is more correct. Now, obviously in emergency situations this system could be lifted in the interest of public safety. Also, when things need to be retracted they shouldn't just be a little ticker that scrolls across the screen once. Sometimes I feel they say half-truths to be deliberately misleading. Or off to the side they could have a little "Fact Checker" person that could produce evidence to support claims, maybe with a red light meaning risky story not yet confirmed, yellow very likely to be true, and green is factual and confirmed. Haha this has really gotten out of hand. I think it could be time for bed.

Golden Sisters NOT as good as Golden Girls

So, I started watching the Golden Sisters' show... They are sort of cute goofy old ladies but I think the comparison some are making to "reality TV's Golden Girls" is lofty to say the least. Now maybe that is because I am a dyed-in-the-wool serious Golden Girls Junkie but other than their relative age, and wild scenarios I see no comparisons. I realize for the time my girls were quite scandalous but these new broads just seem like fowl-mouthed crazy old ladies. Don't get me wrong, I hope to have my fair share of fun when I get old, and god knows I love to drop F bombs right and left but all their bickering and bleeping just gets on my nerves. I grew up watching Golden Girls religiously. When asked in a "Sweet Six" competition (small town annual pageant for 6 y/o girls) what my favorite television show was I answered honestly that Golden Girls was my favorite. I am pretty sure they thought I was lying and that single-handedly lost me the competition.  But that isn't important... What is, is how awesome Blanche, Dorothy, Sophia, and Rose really are. They tackled serious issues with humor, whit, and grace and waaay before their time. Namely homosexuality, artificial insemination, teen pregnancy, and sexuality as a senior citizen. I was trying to decide who is my favorite Golden Girl and I realized that is what made the show so great, I love all of them equally. I feel like it's being told to pick your favorite child, just impossible to choose because they all have such great, lovable, hilarious personalities.  Between "Picture it Sicily...." St. Olaf stories, Dorothy's quick whit, and Blanche's stories of the loss of innocence under magnolia trees it is my favorite show of all time. With Designing women in a close 2nd of course. ;-) Bless those Golden Girls and congratulations to Betty White for continuing to be one bad ass lady.

Faceless Woman

I saw this photographer on Yahoo! today and I am in love with her photographs! Not making much of a "real" post today but I am pretty sure I have no readers so this is really just for myself. The photographer is Patty Maher and these haunting, beautiful, narrative photos really speak to something in me. All of her photos feature women who's faces are obscured, often by hair or taken from a posterior view. These photos communicate clearly but with so many possible meanings. I was surprised to see so much emotion in a photo with out being able to look at a face. I want to hang them around my home just so I can gawk at them whenever I please. I love finding things that really speak to me and these photos certainly do that.

View her photos and a video here.

This is her flickr.

Thunderstorm

A cool wind begins to blow through the trees, the leaves sound like ocean waves. The crickets and cicadas creak and hum as the scorching sun dips bellow the horizon. And I think of you. As the first drops fall on hot asphalt and disappear, there is a stirring in the skies and I imagine your smile. A quick burst of light illuminates the sky and a low rumble follows. I hear you laughing. The sweat and rain and tears mix as they run down my face. I ache for your touch. As loneliness overtakes me I weep, the skies open up. A cool healing shower from the heavens pours down upon me. In me all the anger is extinguished the rage is doused to steaming smouldering ash. I can almost feel of your lips on mine, the smell of the air from your lungs, the heat of your body. The thunder cracks and rolls and my wet skin raises with tiny bumps. Bathed in the rain the my hope is restored that one day 

you may return to me.

Reaching Equality

I want to start off by saying how glad I am that the SCOTUS repealed DOMA. I was worried there for a minute. I like to see our country making progress in the right direction. While I certainly chalk this up as a won battle, it isn't the end of the war. We have taken a great step forward don't get me wrong but we can't just sit back and call it a day just yet. Gay marriage is still only legal in 12 states an D.C. We are not all equal under the law just yet but I think we can get there. What really makes me angry is that in the state I live in it is legal to rape animals but not marry the person of your dreams if they share the same genitalia as you. It makes me want to rip my hair out. How can we possibly tolerate the existence of these laws or lack of. Why are we not exercising more of our power as citizens in our government. We want to complain that nothing getting done but anything worth having is worth fighting for. We get all excited during a presidential election and then drop the ball for three years. If we really want to fix the problems this country faces it will require that everyone becomes involved. Many people are so apathetic because they don't think real change is possible. They are right, if no one takes the time to vote and spread information about their cause. Getting involved takes effort, that most people aren't willing to put forth, and instead they chose to remain uninformed and assume things will sort themselves out. I can tell you this; change is a dirty job and a hands off approach to the government will leave everyone unsatisfied. SO get out and vote, share your opinions, debate with friends, read, read, read, fact check, and write your congress men and women. That is how you have to get things done. Over and Out.

Idiot Rant

In the news recently I saw a video of Bill Cunningham telling Tamara Holder to "know [her] role and shut [her] mouth." All I could think was. "You have got to be fucking kidding me!" Every time I begin to see the glimmer of hope in society some asshat goes and spoils it for me. I didn't even find this part of the program to be the most offensive. Why do we give so much screen time to shouting morons? I may be biased, but I rarely (not to say never) find liberals shouting unfounded claims over the person they are meant to debate, calling names like stooge, fascist, or telling another human being to shut up and stick to their "role" in society. I am so sick and tired of people (Bill O'reilly, Rush Limbaugh, Ted Nugent I'm lookin' at you) acting like bullies thinking that some how if they yell louder what they are saying is any more true or accurate. You just look like an insecure dickbag. Then people say Piers Morgan is a "pussy" no, he's relatively polite and does his best not to start a shouting match which no one wants to listen to. You may have some good points (though I doubt it) but the second you start shouting and violently thrusting your finger in another person's face I write you off, then and there. You have shown me that you have no control and I can no longer trust your opinion as being valid enough to waste my time on. On another note, I would love to know what Mr. Cunningham thinks a woman's "role" entails. I am sure it would be great for a good chuckle. The sad part is he isn't the only person (notice I didn't say man) out there with these antiquated ideas on a woman's place in the world. If you are a man and you are stupid enough to believe garbage about women having limited intellegence, or being too emotional, or going bat shit crazy on a full moon if it is their third menses of a leap year or any other ridiculous claim that aims at making women less than capable of informed decisions then I say to you as politely as I possibly can muster, "You Sir, can go fuck yourself." I refuse to believe in all your experience leading up to being a middle aged politician every woman you met was a psyco, ditsy, baby maker with no ability to understand logic like the men folk do. This is an excuse you put out to pad your ego and keep our country stuck in the past. And if you are a woman who has been spoon-fed this load from childhood I pity you deeply, and beg of  you to pull your head out of the sand and inform yourself. You are incredibly powerful if you would just realize your potential. No one has any rights to your body or mind except you. Women do not let your daughters grow up with these same self-limiting beliefs. Fuck the glass ceiling, if you teach her it is there she will always be looking out for it, instead teach her she is already above it and just as good as any good'ol boy who is already a member of the club. I like the slogan that women are the most valuable untapped resource in the world. It is true we are only using a mostly male fraction of our adult population and in this great time of need for social and government change we need all the help we can get. I also want to say that I LOVE men, I have been blessed with having exceptionally great men as grandfathers, fathers, brother, cousins, friends and lovers and so I find this other breed to be all the more disturbing. They really try hard to spoil the bunch. So, to the good men out there if you come in contact with (and you will) any of these blowhards please do yourself and every woman a favor and lead by example. Show them what real men stand for. They stand for equality for every person, charity, justice, compassion, peace, and when peace is no longer an option kicking serious ass. What this country needs is more men and women in politics who truly look out for the people, not their bank accounts. What is worse, is I couldn't even begin to tell you how to fix the world we live in. I can tell you being informed, finding and electing truly GOOD people is where it has to start.

Firsts

This is the first blog post I have ever written.  I do not promise correct grammar or punctuation in this or any other post I will make but I will do my best. Beginning this blog makes me think of new beginnings in general. A feeling I have been missing. Firsts are so exhilarating, frightening, and rewarding. Being in a long term monogamous relationship has made me envious of the experience of a first kiss with a new person. I worry about never having that feeling again for the rest of my life. It is one of the best one will ever encounter. Getting to stare into someone's eyes with your heart pounding wondering if you could possibly want something more than their lips on yours. The goosebumps and butterflies as you wait for what seems like an eternity for the slightest of movement that brings them closer. Then it all envelops you in a glorious release of tension. It feels like your heart is actually increasing in size. The only sad part is that as much as you grow to love someone every other kiss will pale in comparison. Maybe it's just me.

The fist time you walk into a new classroom, the day you start a new job, meeting a new friend, the first bite of a new food, the first warm day after a long winter when you role down the car window and hang your arm out in the sun, the first time you read you favorite poem, the first time you heard a song that made you believe someone else out there was feeling exactly what you are. The beautiful fleeting moments in life that are bitter sweet and precious because they are so rare. For me it was cool nights in the summer listening to Brand New's "Okay I Believe You but my Tommy Gun don't" or "Soco Amaretto Lime" and feeling completely invincible if only I knew of life then, what I know now. I would have held on to those moments a little tighter and not fought so hard to "grow up." I hope some of you have been able to feel that way at some point in your life, and you continue to find those moments.